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Author Topic: PETA hillarious.!!  (Read 2938 times)

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Offline GRIZ

  • Master Outdoorsman
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I got this from another guy Buck NE

Decided to start a new topic on my game with PETA.

This is my correspondence with PETA so far.

Dear PETA,

I understand that every year millions of field mice are killed in combines harvesting soybeans. I am interested in finding a source of tofu made with handpicked soybeans, with certification that they are handpicked and animal friendly. Any help would be appreciated.

Thank you.

This was PETA'S response.

Thank you for contacting PETA.

I'm afraid that we're not aware of any certified sources of tofu made with handpicked soybeans. While we appreciate your concern for animals killed during harvesting, it is worth remembering that it is virtually impossible to live without causing some harm. For example, even if hand-harvested soy products were available, they would likely be transported to market by trucks with animal-derived tires that also cause the deaths of insects and other animals while on the road.

By insisting upon an almost unreachable level of moral purity, we also run the risk of alienating potential vegetarians by making vegetarianism appear to be difficult, unpleasant, or outright annoying?a course of action that could cause more harm to animals than eating "normal" tofu. For more thoughts on this subject, please see http://www.CaringConsumer.com/resources_ingredients.asp and http://www.GoVeg.com/effectiveAdvocacy_personal.asp.

Each person must decide for her/himself to what lengths one should go in order to fulfill one's ethical obligations, and we respect your decision to eat food which causes the least amount of suffering possible. To learn more about ways to help animals killed for food, visit http://www.GoVeg.com/getActive.asp.

Thanks again for writing and for everything you do for animals!

Sincerely,

The PETA Staff

And this is what I sent back.

Dear PETA,
I chose my vegetarian lifestyle to prevent the torture and death of the animals I would consume if I were a meat eater. In a typical year, if I weren't a vegetarian, I might consume part of a cow, part of a pig, and maybe 2 dozen chickens. By contrast, by eating combine picked tofu, I am complicit in the deaths of hundreds of mice and rabbits. I do not differentiate between a worthy animal and a less worthy animal by their sizes. The life of a mouse is just as important as the life of a cow. This has placed me in a dilemma for which I see no way out.

PETA hasn't responded to the last email, so this is what I sent them this morning.

Dear PETA,

Yesterday I wrote you with my concern for the many animals, such as mice and rabbits, which are killed during the harvest of soybeans by combines, and asked if you knew of a supplier who sells soy products from handpicked soybeans. You replied with a very thoughtful explanation that we must sometimes take the least hurtful path, but cannot eliminate the deaths of animals in our consumption, completely.

In order to to do the least amount of damage to these animals, I am changing my diet, and will no longer eat soybeans. My garden is producing strawberries and leafy vegetables at this time, and when they come into season, watermelons are an option, but I understand that I need some kind of protein to replace what I formerly received from soybeans. Do you have a recommendation for a protein source that is not picked by machines that kill animals in the process?

Thank you.

I've got them going. Now I've got PETA's Correspondence Coordinator personally helping me

Thank you for sharing your further thoughts with us.

Please know that we aren't suggesting that the lives of cows, chickens and pigs are more valuable than those of mice, rabbits, etc. However, the issues involved are complicated and interconnected, so it's important to consider "the big picture."

Say you were choosing, for example, whether to eat a hamburger or a veggie burger. You might think, "If I eat the hamburger, then I am (at least in part) responsible for the death of a cow, but if I eat the veggie burger, I might be responsible for the deaths of a number of animals killed in harvesting the plants used to make the patty." But this would be a short-sighted comparison because it ignores the fact that the cow killed for the hamburger was, in turn, fed food from mechanically-harvested plants. So by eating the hamburger, you become responsible not just for the life of the cow, but also for all of the animals killed in harvesting the plants.

If we look even more closely at this example, we would find that for every pound of flesh from a cow's body that can be sold as beef, (s)he must be fed sixteen pounds of grain. Not only is this incredibly wasteful, but it means that by eating a pound of beef, we're not only responsible for the life of the cow, but for sixteen times the number of animal lives that would be lost if we just ate a pound of grain instead.

In the end, although we can't eliminate all suffering, we can vastly minimize the suffering by eating a vegan diet. Once we've made that change, by putting the focus on helping others adopt a vegetarian diet, we can help save more animals' lives than by trying to eliminate trace amounts of animal-derived ingredients or attempting to reach an unattainable level of ethical purity.

I hope you will take the time to read the commentaries at http://www.CaringConsumer.com/resources_ingredients.asp and http://www.GoVeg.com/effectiveAdvocacy_personal.asp; you may find them very thought-provoking as you consider how best to help make this a kinder, more compassionate world. Whatever you decide, please know that we are here to support and help in whatever way we can.

Thank you again for your notes. I hope this is helpful to you. We look forward to working with you to save animals' lives!

Sincerely,

Jeff (deleted to foil google search on the name)
Correspondence Coordinator
People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals

This is what I sent back to this Jeff guy.

Jeff,

Thank you for your reply to my question. I understand the difficult tradeoff we must make to save the lives of these animals. But, I can't help but feel there is something more we can do. I have spoken about this with several of my friends. This fall, we are planning to go to several farms during harvest time, and clear the fields of mice and rabbits ahead of the combines. We plan to lineup abreast and run ahead of the harvesting combines and drive the mice and rabbits away before the combine reaches them. We are discussing the use of noisemakers. Since it would do no harm to his crops, I don't believe any reasonable farmer would object to this. Everyone in the group has expressed his willingness to face a charge of trespassing if this is what it takes. We would very much like to get the support and endorsement of PETA in this effort.

Thank you.

PETA's REPLY

Thank you for your e-mail to PETA.

Unfortunately, we don't have the information you are looking for. Almost all commercially-grown crops are harvested by machines; it is almost impossible to avoid this. Even for those that are handpicked, farm workers can unintentionally harm or kill insects of other animals during handling. In short, there is no way to assure that your food has not in some way resulted in animal suffering.

Again, please remember that veganism is not merely about dogma--it is about bringing about change. We can try in vain to be 100 percent pure, or we can support products that, while not perfect, will nevertheless prevent a great deal of animal suffering. Although we certainly respect your dedication, we don't believe it's productive to focus a lot of time and energy on issues like this, as doing so has very little impact on actually helping animals. Instead, we recommend that people use their time and talents to get active to help animals, such as volunteering at their local animal shelter, promoting vegetarianism to others, joining our Activist Network, etc. For tips on things you can do locally to help animals, please visit our Web sites http://www.AnimalActivist.com and http://www.HelpingAnimals.com.

For more information on veganism, please visit our Web site http://www.GoVeg.com.

Thanks again for your e-mail, and for all you do to help animals!

Sincerely,

Elizabeth (deleted to avoid google hits on this site)
PETA Correspondent

My reply to PETA

Dear PETA,

If you feel running in front of the combines to clear the fields of mice and rabbits would have little value, then our group will seek other avenues to protect animals, although I'm a little shocked at your callousness toward these animals. I still believe that we could save hundreds, maybe thousands, of mice and rabbits.

Instead, our group will protest outside of Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurants. We will make some signs, and hopefully draw media attention. I've seen that in other campaigns, PETA volunteers have worn chicken costumes while protesting. I've searched ebay for chicken suits, and could find none. Do you know of any stores that rent or sell chicken suits? If possible, we would like to get some child sized chicken suits for some of the children to wear. Your help in this would be very much appreciated.

Thank you.

Ok, they are still too stupid to understand when someone is yanking their chain.

Hello,



My name is Nicole and I am the KFC Activist Liaison for PETA. I was sent your email about planning a KFC demo, I would be happy to work with you to find a chicken costume and to get the materials you need!



Can you please send the following information so that can start planning your demo:



Your name
The address to send your demo pack to (we can?t ship to P.O. Boxes)
Date and time of protest
Address of the KFC you will be protesting


I look forward to hearing from you!

Nicole (deleted to minimize google hits on this site)
KFC Activist Liaison
People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals
585-563-6286
757-943-0571

And Nicole isn't only dumb, she's not bad looking either. Here's a picture of her I found.



My latest email to Nicole.
Nicole,

Thank you for your reply. Our group held a meeting last night to discuss a demonstration at a KFC. I had forwarded your email to the members of the group. Last night, one of our members, Del, stated that he'd seen press photos of your Memphis demonstration in bathing suits. He suggested that we do the same. Although the vision of Del in a Speedo would likely drive all patrons from the KFC, it would likely severely tarnish the PETA image. Other members were eager for you to be present at the demonstration.

Thank you for your support, and we look forward to working with you in the future.



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« Last Edit: June 06/17/06, 08:27:50 PM by GRIZ »
"The two enemies of the people are criminals and government, so let us tie the second down with the chains of the constitution so the second will not become the legalized version of the first."
~Thomas Jefferson

Offline SoHawk

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HAHA damn Griz go for it!!!  you should be able to make her see the light!  ;D :D

Offline GRIZ

  • Master Outdoorsman
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I could only read so much of it myself as it is too long. That guy has them suckered along though. Just thought it was funny how they were trying to justify and cover thier butts.
"The two enemies of the people are criminals and government, so let us tie the second down with the chains of the constitution so the second will not become the legalized version of the first."
~Thomas Jefferson

Offline Joe

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    • Outdoors Weekly
I bet they get a lot of legit emails that are just as wacky. It's probably tough to tell the difference. What is that picture on the bottom? I click on it and it opens up the same size.
Here's to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one.
A pretty girl and an honest one.
A cold pint-- and another one!