Just seems wrong.

[tangle tooth]

      I don't do Facebook. My wife and daughter do. They both got messages today from my cousin that my 106 year old aunt passed away. This cousin has my phone number and my email address.
      This doesn't seem like the kind of news you should hear on social media first. She died early this morning, as of 19:00 today, still no call or email. My wife is not impressed, either.
      My wife sent my cousin an email asking why she(cousin) couldn't have called one of us first. No response yet.
      It just seems wrong.

[Leech~~]

      I don't do Facebook. My wife and daughter do. They both got messages today from my cousin that my 106 year old aunt passed away. This cousin has my phone number and my email address.
      This doesn't seem like the kind of news you should hear on social media first. She died early this morning, as of 19:00 today, still no call or email. My wife is not impressed, either.
      My wife sent my cousin an email asking why she(cousin) couldn't have called one of us first. No response yet.
      It just seems wrong.

It's a scam, their just trying to collect people info.  Don't open, reply or click on it. 

[Steve-o]

I'm speaking in broad terms her - not of your particular situation or family, but...

I think previous generations did a better job of passing on how one should pay their respects when someone dies:  make the calls, bring food for the family, attend the visitation - with the whole family AND all the kids. 

Talking about death is always hard and who likes to do hard things.  Especially having tough conversations with family members you might not have personal relationships with.  It just easier to post it up move on.

I agree your situation was handled poorly.  In our family we've made sure phone calls are made down to the first cousin level - and depending on how the friends and family tree splits, may ask other people to pass the word from there - recommending direct call to those who probably deserve them.

I appreciate seeing some death posts on social media - especially for folks of long acquaintance who I don't see regularly.  But using social media should be an AND with direct contact to family members, not an OR.

My condolences. 

[FishThumper]

Sorry to hear about your loss. Sadly I’d say that is rather normal these days. Facebook has become the communication of choice for many people these days. In some ways I understand it, it’s a great way to get info. Out to large amounts of people atone time. I do agree that it is not a real personal communication method though. I think it’s just a part of the world we live in these day.

[Jrasmussen]

Sorry to hear about your loss. Sadly I’d say that is rather normal these days. Facebook has become the communication of choice for many people these days. In some ways I understand it, it’s a great way to get info. Out to large amounts of people atone time. I do agree that it is not a real personal communication method though. I think it’s just a part of the world we live in these day.

Agree with everything you said Thumper, it is sad that you can't expect a phone call when something like that happens. Sorry for your loss to the OP

[LPS]

I am curious to hear if she really died.  I see so many things on Youtube about celebrities that they say have died.  They did not die, it is just spewing crap to see if people will click on it.  My condolences to you either way.

[Dotch]

I tend to agree with you tangle tooth. Depends somewhat on how tightknit the family is I suppose. Unfortunately communication has been trending towards the more impersonal for quite some time. Having all these tools at our disposal has only made the process more fragmented and disjointed. I appreciate a phone call when it's someone who was important to me. I'm not on Facebook either other than Marketplace and neither is my wife. Since I'm used to sending out emails to large mailing lists it doesn't bother me to receive info that way sometimes. Easy to attach photos, copies, etc. I'm on X (formerly Twitter) but use it primarily for amusement purposes. Someone sent me a Snapchat once so I'm on that. Don't understand how to use it so I ignore it. I'm not a big fan of putting personal information out on public display as is frequently the case with some on Facebook. Large group texts are also a pet peeve. Phone keeps going off incessantly as people keep chiming in.  With some older people such as in our car club, just have to call them as they don't text or email or refuse to check their email if they have it. Facebook? Ya right. One of my favorites is still a hand written note or a thank you in the mail. Or a bottle of Boodles someone left for me in the truck...

[tangle tooth]

      Thank you, all. She really did pass. She was 106 years old and had been in hospice for almost two years. She was my mom's younger sister. They said she was ready.
      As for being close, we were not. That side of the family is all in Texas. San Antonio and Austin, primarily. My dads family lives in Texas and Chicago. Last time we saw her, my 41 year old daughter was 8 years old. I was tolerated but they didn't like me killing Bambi and Thumper and they voiced their objections many times.

[LPS]

Sorry for the loss anyways.