Lake Iwanttobethere

[Tami]

Tess came in to the Beauty Shoppe for her weekly hair do. I greeted her as she whispered to me..
Hows Burtha? still mad? has Barney.. not the dog... come home yet?

I shook my head no to all of the answers, i mean i didn't think Burtha was mad anymore, because she got some good news today that her sister and Mother were coming for a visit and maybe staying. Burtha's Mother named Florance, guess they call her Flo, left her 6th Husband Wilbur. I wonder what they all would look like and if they all looked like Burtha.. God help us all , is all i could think of as i walk with Tess to the chair so i can shampoo her hair..

Tess again still not sure about Burtha whispers..

I heard that Barney.. not the dog.. was keeping a old still some where, making gin. Maybe if you find the still you will find Barney. Why did he leave Burtha anyways?

Again not knowing any of this i just shrug and start the water wetting Tess's hair shampooing it..Then after i am done i roll a towel around her head and walk her to the chair, and pump the foot petal to get her up to my height, for a good curling with rollers.

Burtha got up out of her chair from behind the front desk and was walking over, silence fall over the place , all that could be heard was the swish swishing swish noise from Burthas legs rubbing together as she walked. Tess looks up at me as i turn around to see her stopping by us.. I looked down at Tess as she lowers her head covering her mouth so her giggle wouldn't her heard.. Seeing what we were seeing i almost busted out as well, but i know better for sure..

Burtha shows us both a picture of a two piece swimsuit out of one of them model magazines order books.

All i could think of was..... a two piece? With that body?

I stood there blinking, holding the towel that was once on Tess's head... Speechless...But then the silence breaks and i hear a soft voice... its Tess's

Are you sure thats your color Burtha?

My jaw drops.. color? shes worried about color? what about the rest ?

Thoughts running through my mind, then it happens, uncontrollably.. with out warning ..

A two price? do them make them that big? i said out loud..

Ever had one of them days when your thinking something and it just comes out? Well that was today..

Big Burtha turned and looked at me, my knees shaking, i looked away like it never happened, and to my surprise she starts laughing.. A few around the shoppe do as well, but not me.. i am pretty scared rightflipping through the book as she is still laughing..

Laugher for most isn't scary but for me it is..

After i bit i finished with Tess's hair, shes happy with it once again. I take her money and give her the change back and out the door she goes, I walk over to the window and see her laughing so hard, i just shake my head and wonder... Would you like to see old Big Burtha is a two piece? Not I

Stay warm and safe
Put another log on the fire
From me to you from Lake Iwanttobethere

[Bobby Bass]

Cold out on the ice today, but not to cold to go fishing. Had to feed the stove a little more then I normally do, and it was a nice cherry red on the outside. Glad I had cleaned out the rafters in the wood shop and I had the fire going good with the hardwood scraps that I was shoving in between bites. Didn't have time to get cold as I was busy going between the stove and the holes and chatting on the CB which was crackling away. A lot of people out on the ice, to cold to be at home working on any projects and it was a Saturday.  Luge was quiet, no one in there right mind was going to run down that in this kind of weather. Bluebird skies and the flags were stirring on there poles. I had -10 on my fishing gal thermometer outside the shacks door. With my dome skylight I had an advantage over others as the sun streamed in and at least the area from about two feet above the floor was toasty. But when the sun goes down I will be in the Jeep and heading to the Lodge.

From my windows I see smoke from shacks but no open doors. A few trucks idling away with guys watching there tip up's from inside. Before leaving the shack last night I stood outside and listen for the violin player. I didn't hear a thing. I heard a few others talking at the Lodge that they to had heard the music the other night. Who ever it was they could play, everyone agreed on that. A couple of eating size walleyes sit in the white five gallon pail, they will find there way to the table for a meal at half time during the football game tomorrow. Just a few weeks away from the end of football season. Ice out won't be to much longer after that. Then we have the wait.. For open water and the return of shirtsleeve weather. This winter has moved at a brisk pace. Christmas is nothing but a memory already. Deer season, long gone. We should be harvesting our ice for the Lodges ice house but we are going to wait for the weather to improve. Ice is just getting thicker the longer we wait right now. Hard crust on the snow with this cold. Going to make it a little tuff on the grouse and easy picking for the fox to run down the rabbits. Deer seem to be doing just fine but we still have some cold to get through.

Far end of the lake got down to -37 so they say last night, add some wind to it and tourists have something to take back down south with them. Ma's sauna has been doing a good business this week and Hank and Skinny have had to bring her wood twice. Reed dropped the paper work on the Mill over and the elders are looked over it and signed off. Looks like sometime early next week the sale can be completed. Town will be happy, some money for improvements. Trouble will be what kind of improvements.  Well sun is getting low, better wrap this up and close up the shack. I got what I came for. From Lake Iwanttobethere (679)

[nytelyter]

LakeIwanttobethere weekly Hold'Em Poker tournement
alright here goes it looks like we will have enough players for almost two tables. but as it will be an open tournement any one who wants to be there to play will be able to play. and i will be set up for an hour before play time to teach those who want to learn the game.  i have gone over my scvhedule for the next few months and heres what i got. my preferred day would be on saturdays at 12:30 pm and with two tables we should be able to have a play time of an hour and forty five minutes to two and a half hours.  my alternet night would be wednesdays at 6:30. please be early to get signed up so we can start on time. we will run for 16 weeks and have a play off for some kind of grand prize for the season. you will get weekly points for attending and bonus points for the first thru forth places each night. please chime in on which day works best for you. and we will go for the majority.

[Tami]

Signs her name up
Ng, anytime works for me..
See you there

[Bobby Bass]

Nytelyter, please sign me up and I have never played any cards before except maybe some goldfish with Elmer. Do we use jokers?   Bobby

[Bobby Bass]

Found this beautiful winter poem and thought it might be a comfort to you.
It was to me and it's very well written and I hope that you enjoy it.

" WINTER " by Abigail Elizabeth McIntyre





Sh**, It's Cold
The End

lakeiwanttobethere@yahoo.com

[Spinach]

Great poem, very appropriate for this weekend.

[Tami]

Right to the point and so true, thanks for sharing

[Duckslayer]

Sooo, I decided to go for a walk this afternoon and figured that it would be a good time to go and sort of snoop around the outside of the old mill.  Being new to the area have heard a lot about the place but have not had a good chance to really check it out.  I figured if I were gonna do it I better do it now.  Well, the path looked like a major through way when I went down there and some of the foot prints a fella has to wonder about!  Most looked like normal foot traffic but there was a set of foot prints that looked like they may have belonged to Mrs Sasquatch or something.  I noticed that there was what looked like a set of wagon wheel tracks in and out of the area.  Then I saw what appeared to be a trail of blood drops here and there.  I started to wonder if I should not turn back and forget it.  Maybe those stories of animal sacrifice out there were true…  I walked around the place for a little bit but I did not dilly dally in the area.  It seemed that there was no normal wild life in the area either.  Usually there are pigeons that hang out in places like this but I did not notice any.  Kind of eerie feeling there for a bit but who knows, there may be a logical explanation for it all.

Have found in this super cold weather the furnace in the cabin has a hard time keeping up!  I shut off the rooms that we are not using and fired up the fireplace.  Will have to get some of that wood I saw on the bulletin board at the Lodge.  One of those little things that I should have checked further into before making the offer but it is my house now and I will deal with it.

I think that I am going to have to let McGurk win a couple of games of cribbage.  He volunteered to put some snow around my fish house but I was not expecting it to be piled 4 feet up all the way around!  Maybe after a couple of wins he will feel good enough to bring his super dooper snow thrower over and clear some of that away.

Nytelyter, Saturdays and Wednesdays work fine for me I guess.  Seems that there is never enough time to get everything done that a fella wants to but I will make them work.  Oh, I am not laughing at you I am laughing with you but I hear tell that you got a bit wet out fishing the other day!  I knew them 12 inch augers would be no good! Eh eh eh

Hope that you all are keeping warm!  May your team win the game tonight, I will be at the lodge watching it of course… where else would a fella hang out?!  Take care and N Joy the Hunt././Jimbo

[Bobby Bass]

Cloudy skies here at the lake today so you know what that means? Yup on the ole gal thermometer the temp is back above zero. Dogs spent a little more time outside this morning, Bud even went out on patrol of the yard. Pepper made a beeline to Elmers back door but did not spend to much time waiting for him to open the door and was back waiting to get inside the cabin. Will be boarding a shepherd named Smoky for the next few days, somehow my son got himself talked into it and before I know it the dog is here at the cabin. Little excitement last night as Barney the dog and Smoky had to establish a pecking order. Took about an hour for all the dogs to find a place to sleep and I found myself with another dog at my feet.

With the wind calm and some warmer temps today there were a few doors on the shanties open and in the ice town it was fishing as usual. Was at the Lodge most of the day, delivery day and had a bunch of notes and orders to go through. Have to talk to Nytelyter about ordering cards and poker chips. Unless we want to play with pringles, different flavors could be different monetary amounts. We did that once with girl scout cookies but all the thin mints got eaten in the first hour.


Reed was here for lunch, was hoping to run into the stranger buying the Old Mill. Paperwork is complete except no one knows the strangers name so that needs to be filled in and of course payment received.  Paying in cash does make the exchange quicker for everyone.  Sheriff Tim was in for lunch, had two bowls of the chili and then said he was on his way over to Amy's for pie. Between scoops he said that the lake has gone quiet again and no sign of anything or anybody that was making the fuss on the lake. He did say he saw some pictures from a trail cam but they seem to be over developed or something was wrong with the camera. The object in the camera took several shots to cover it from end to end and they were blurred, all the colors were there just like a rainbow. There was call from Polly about lights and noises coming from the Old Grain Mill so Tim made a trip out there but the snow was so trampled he could not really do much more then walk around and make sure no one was there.

Made my visit to the hobby shop this afternoon after I left the Lodge, Time to pick up a block of balsa wood so I can start working on some new top water lures for this season. I have an idea for some I am going to use for Mr. Big. My new computer sketch pad came in also I had to stop at the post office and wait for Mark to come in so I could sign for it. My daughter the artist has one and it looks like a lot of fun to play with. Perhaps a map of the lake will be posted soon. Well time to let dogs out and take a walk to the wood pile. Cold weather took care of the pile by the cabin. From Lake Iwanttobethere.. (755)

lakeiwanttobethere@yahoo.com

[D.T.]

He did say he saw some pictures from a trail cam but they seem to be over developed or something was wrong with the camera. The object in the camera took several shots to cover it from end to end and they were blurred, all the colors were there just like a rainbow.

Could have been Bertha looking for Barney. Not the dog.

[Tami]

Big Burtha stands inside her shoppe looking out the big bay windows to the road, arms crossed as always over her big burtha's, as she watches up and down the road.. Not having seen Barney.. not the dog.. for days, she figures hes off doing the gin again. It doesn't matter to her now that she got the news that her mother Flo and sister  Brandi the dancer and her twin..Burtice, Burt for short ..are coming back to the lake. The Butt sisters back together again, She laughs out loud knowing Barney.. not the dog..will be snack talk about. She saids out loud.. that man will have it coming for sure..
Burtha goes back and sits down behind the front counter and picks up the phone and dials.

Do you have item number 4872649, in a size 5 xl? Oh you do, thats the flowered print two piece swimsuit right? I will take it, do you have bright pink shoes to match and maybe a huge brim hat too, something maybe with a big flower to match the swimsuit? Ohh perfect yes i want all 3..Let me get my Husband's card..

After giving the lady all the info she hangs up and sits back smiling, just as she sees the old aqua station wagon pull up, she squeals in joy, its her family...

[Bobby Bass]

Jumping back just in time that only the tips of my boots were ran over by the aqua colored Mercury grocery getting station wagon. I could see a face looking back at me in the rear view mirror as it rolled by. Looking like one of them clown cirrus cars it was filled with colorful costumes and big wigs. At least that is what I saw from my vantage point now safely behind them. I thought they were at first headed towards Dug's garage as it looked like a shock was broken, perhaps even the leaf springs on both sides of the rear end. But they drove by and continued up the street in the direction of the beauty shoppe. Checking the street in both directions I crossed and headed to Big Earl's

[Dotch]

Got another one! Boy these hammer handles are really biting today on this Swedish pimple. That possum tail really works well to dress that hook up a little bit. Catch a few more and the Lodge should be supplied with pickled northern for months. Good thing I put another small log in the fish house stove. Those dogfish fillets are smellin' mighty tasty! (takes jackknife and places the morsels on metal plate) Mmmmm....just like Mom used to make. There goes my bobber again!

Well, it's getting dark. Reckon I'd best head for town and see what's going on there. (pulls up lines, opens door, puts bucket of fish Binder, hops in and cranks it over) Man this thing sure starts and runs good after converting it over to G-85 (85% gin, 15% everclear) And, it leaves a nice pine scent, sort of like the restroom at the Lodge only a little bit burnt. Who knows? Maybe put Lake Iwanttobethere on the map by solving the energy crisis. And that little spigot on the bottom of the tank sure comes in handy from time to time too!

(bounces up the bank on the access and onto the road into town) Sure has been chilly as of late. Don't run across many folks out wandering around on a day like today. Whoops! Who the sam heck is that walking along the road? Big hairy dude, that's for sure. Looks a little like that picture of Jim Morrison from the Doors last album on steroids. Hey feller, need a lift? Cold out. Hop in. (stranger nods and hops in the passenger side of the Binder) Don't hit your head on the ceiling. Not a lot of padding up there. You new to the area, Pal? (stranger grunts and looks out window) Yeah, I'm on my way into town for a bit, check out the sights, run into the Lodge for a Hamms or two, then take them fish in that bucket home so Lucifur and Gustafur, my trusty border collies can help me clean them. They bite the heads off and gut 'em for me. All I hafta do then is to take the skin off and put 'em in the brine to soak. You fish much there Bud? (stranger grunts again, face still turned towards the window) You sure don't say much but that's okay; I talk enough for the both of us! (the Binder pulls past the Old Mill and suddenly the large hairy stranger opens the door and rolls out, vanishing into the woods)

What the...????? Chatty feller, that's fer sure. Pew! Sorta gamey too. Binder hasn't smelled like this since Dad let the valet parking guy with BO park it at the Curtis Hotel in Minneapolis 40 years ago. Maybe it's the same guy! Wait a minute...that turkey took all my fish and the rutabagas I was bringing to Bobby! Last time I ever give him a ride! Wonder if Bobby'll play me double or nothing? Can stop at Nytelyter's and check in on the poker schedule then drop that sweetcorn off at the Duckalyser household on the way home. Oh no! That dude took my sweet corn too. Guess he must've been bound up. Well, that stuff oughta keep him regular. Wait'll I tell the guys at the Lodge that the Lizard King lives!

[Tami]

Burtha runs outside just as the aqua wagon doors fly open, out comes mother Flo.. Nows shes a thin thing, tall bee hive hair do, and smacking her gun, talking with one of them southern accents, like howdy y'all sort of thing.. She looks so much like Flo from Mel's Dinner tv show way back when. Wearing mint green pantsuit with big white earrings that hang out to her shoulders, carrying a huge purse, looks like made out of some road kill. They hug and the squealing of joy starts again, just as Burtha twin sister Burtice finally pulls herself from the car, it look like something out a blob moving..
Now Burt looks just like Burtha in every way, they even dress alike, in the same style colors.. huge prints...
The last one who gets out, looking around, pulling her sweater closer around her is Brandi, the youngest of the girls..She looks like model, i heard shes a dancer.. Maybe she was adopted cause shes so beautiful and theres no way shes related them them..
Brandi smiles at me as i watch from the inside of the shoppe, i smile back, i have never seen anyone with green eyes so bright, just like a cat..The men are going to drool over her i am sure.

As they enter the shoppe, i hang up my apron, punch out and dress for the cold.I need to get out of here i cant understand anything with all that squealing going on.. I made my way to the lodge, stopping at the old tree.. Looking to see why we cant see the tail cam, theres nothing blocking it, but it looks so blurry, i see nothing on the cam lends, guess tomorrow i will climb up there and take a closer look.

Jut then i saw a man carrying a case of bottles, i hear them clinging together, he was making his way to the back of the lodge..I followed him to the back door, pulling on its handle, i find the door locked...

was that Barney.. not the dog..?
I hurry into the front doors of the lodge only to see just a few men sitting at the bar, turning to look at me...

[Bobby Bass]

I was assaulted this morning. Well it's not what you are thinking. I had to go into the big city this morning to the supermarket. The wife is going to prepare her award winning county fair lasagna for a small family gathering tonight. The special cheese that she needs comes from Ma and Pa's grocery. The cheese was put out on the counter and our cabin guest Smoky the dog, decide it looked good for breakfast. Bud of course came and got me but by then it was to late. We were worried that Smoky had not eaten since his arrival. That problem has solved it's self. So a call to Ma's was made and she told us she was out of the special cheese till next week.  I got out the coin to make a flip to decide who would make the run into the city. I was told to just put it back in my jeans as the wife had to much to do so there was no choice to be made. I was going.

So after warming up the truck and waiting for what now had become a list of things to do since I was going into the city I was on my way. List was not to bad and most of the stuff I could pick up on my way to visit a few tackle shops along the way.  Might as well do a little shopping for myself. So anyway I am in the big supermarket checking things off the grocery list when I start to feel a little light headed. There is a smell in the air, an odor a well it just smelled bad. Like a drunk evergreen tree maybe even a little like some of Elmers catfish bait that he keeps in a jar on his sun porch.  Coming down the aisle pushing  a cart was a lady who had to be the source of the smell. She walked pass me and smiled, the smell was even worse in her wake. Holding on to my cart I tried to hold my breath and make it out of the aisle. Quickly I sought the safety of the chemical - laundry soap aisle. My head started to clear as I was standing by a shelf full of ammonia. After a few moments I again ventured out into the main aisle. There was a whiff of her still in the air, must have passed this way. I went down toward the deli where the cheese was. I passed several  people with watering eyes and one man was having a sneezing fit. Another man in his powered scooter was offering  him a few shots of air from his oxygen tank. The only place to go was the bakery, I headed there and was rewarded with the sweet smell of hot bread and rolls. In the distant I can see the lady and her perfume cloud checking out.

I finishing shopping and took my bags to the truck. Climbing in my nose started to twitch. Somehow that odor had found it's way onto my coat. Rolling the window down  I found the stub of  a cigar in the ash tray and put some flame to it. With the window down and the heater on high I made the drive back to the cabin. Walking in I took the coat of and at arms length handed it to the wife. " My Fee " for going to the store. " What she asked" as she went through the bags looking for her cheese. " Wash this, today" I said. " Just toss it over my the door. I did what I was told and tossed the jacket near the laundry door. Bud came in for a pat on his head and then walked towards the jacket on the floor. I caught him just as he was raising his rear leg.. Not even Bud liked that smell.. From Lake Iwanttobethere (792)

[McGurk]

Between the bloodied and hooked walking menace, the newly arrived traveling carnivale, the tomfoolery and skullduggery going on around the old mill and the fish shacks, the missing Barney (not the dog), and Duckslayer's ripping me in cards, I may pass on this weekend's trip home to the lake.  Keep a seat open for me at the poker table, though!

[Duckslayer]

Well, there was no action to move any snow from the side of my house so I took the scoop shovel and went out and did it myself.  When it is as cold and windy as it has been that snow can really pack itself down!  Then again, it was blown there with considerable force by a madman with a monster snow blower!  Moved the ice house down to the SE side of the lake figuring that if I found a good spot I could just walk out there from the cabin.  Found a good spot all right!  The Vex indicated that there were fish everywhere!  Man, I thought that I was going to be in heaven!  Well they were there on and off the whole night last night but they were not interested in anything that I threw down there for them to sample.  Oh well, I guess that is why they call it fishing and not catching!  Sure would like a nice plate of fresh pan fish though! 

I stopped in and said hi to Bobby last night too.  Thought that maybe with all the good luck he has been having lately he might have a spare fillet or two laying around but soon after I got there his youngun sprung a dog into the house and said oh yeah dad, we are watching Smoky for a few days.  I left as the dogs were establishing their pecking order.  I suppose once they got that settled the cats would come out and screw it all up again!

So, did anyone notice the clown, the waitress and that purdy lil thing that crawled out of that blue land yacht?  Judging but the reaction of Bertha they must be kin, after all could there be two that looked like her from separate families?  I can see 2 out of the 3 of them but that lil cutie sure seemed out of place.  Sure does seem like I have seen her before somewhere in my travels… but alas those skeletons shall stay hidden.  We had a saying in the Air Force, “What goes on the road stays on the road!”

I discovered after coming back from the fish house last night that the furnace in the garage has decided to take a vacation.  It picked a great time of the year for that!  Took the side cover off the thing and the igniter is not it’s glowing self so I will have to find out how I am going to get that fixed.  The thing is less than a month old but I am pretty sure that Fleet Farm does not have a service tech that is going to come out and look at it for me!  I will have to get the voltage tester out and find out if there is juice getting to it.  If there is then it should be a pretty simple fix once FF and I decide how we are going to do that.  In the mean time it is pretty chilly in the garage.  That means of course that I have a break from finishing putting the carpet in the MG.

I thought that I saw Barney, not the dog, the other night. He sure has been tip toeing around a lot since Sherriff Tim arrived.  I wonder if there is something in his past that has him all nervous and in hiding.  He has always been kind of elusive so I don’t know if Tim has anything to do with it or not. 

I hear tell that Bobby is gonna play poker.  I heard that he is letting folks think that he has never played cards before… yeah right!  He has schooled me pretty well at cribbage and euchre so far so I am not so sure that I am beleibing that one!  Time will tell though.

I suppose that I should get the dishes done.  The lil Mrs came home today with a doosie of a tooth ache!  Turns out she needs a root canal and has an Appt for that in the Cities in the morning.  He gave her some pain pills and they have made her kind of loony.   [thinking to myself “well loonier than normal anyway”] so I will have to pass on going to the lodge tonight and stay here and make sure that she is all right.  From the southern shore of LakeIwannabe there, you all take care and N Joy the Hunt././Jimbo

[Bobby Bass]

The SUN, there high up in the sky shines on the frozen waters of Lake Iwanttobethere  Been so long I thought it had left us for some other lake. The Lodge is cozy with the bright sunshine coming through the deck windows. Deep into the Lodge the light penetrates. Elmer adjust a pillow to cover his face as he sits on the wicker couch watching his noon soap. Lunch crowd is slowing coming in and the sound of feet stomping off snow can be hear at the entrance doors. The coats racks are slowly filling up with an assortment of hats and scarfs and heavy winter coats. Still below zero out but the sun makes such a difference in people's attitudes. The usual buffet is out along the bar top. Coney's and chili. Steamed buns for the coneys and big pickles. For those who want them pickled eggs and pickled pigs feet are there for the asking. Fries and hot wings orders need to yelled back into the kitchen for Gus to prepare. The tapper for the Hamms is getting a work out as nothing goes better at lunch then a cold one. The old popcorn popper has done it's job and the glass box is filled with fresh popcorn. The baskets and salt are on the sideboard and a few are filled and taken away to tables. The tables in the sunshine fill up first and weathered faces are warmed by the rays. Caps are adjusted to keep the light out of the eyes and soon the Lodge sounds like  a middle school lunch room. The clinking of spoons in chili bowls, laughing and the sounds of glasses on table tops.

A few finish and go back to work, there places filled by others coming in. Some cards come out and talk of the poker night can be over heard. Some stand blocking the light at the deck doors while looking out over the shanty town below. Of course fishing is discussed and eyes glance at the contest board. As I tend bar and help Gus with keeping the crock pots full I over hear conversations ranging from Tim the sheriff being in town to the mill being sold and of course the arrival of the Burtha's clan and the looker in the bunch. The Johnson boys went back to college yesterday, they were late as someone had buried the VW  fishing shack and they had lost track of time. With the sun out they managed to open the sunroof and escape. They were out of beer anyway. They will be back in a few weeks to remove the bug from the ice and cash in there kegs. To bad I think Barley and Hopps would have like to have met the new gal.

I was just putting out some fresh chips when the door to the Lodge open and with the sudden silence I looked up. Walking in was one of them big city type ladies, wearing a blue skirt and matching  jacket. She was showing legs which is something not seen in these parts since around Christmas. She had the shape of an hour glass with a few extra minutes in just the right places. I looked up as she headed right in my direction. Grabbing a clean and dry white towel I tossed it across my shoulder and asked her if I could help her as she slid across the wooden stool making the stool very happy. She asked " Are you Bobby Bass" I nodded yes but was already thinking about  what kind of trouble I was in. She slid a business card across the bar to me. I picked it up but not having my reading glasses on and  her being in the way  I could only put my hand out so far and I  could just make out "Publishing Company"  Well it seems she wanted to talk to me about writing a book. More to come on this I think, From Lake Iwanttobethere (833)

[Duckslayer]

WOW... a big city publisher out here in the middle of nowhere!  You must be pretty famous!  Just to let ya know anything that I say when sober on this forum you can use in your book.  After a few beers we may have to change the names to protect the innocent. 

After a marathon two and a half hours in the dentists chair this morning the Lil Mrs no longer has an absessed tooth.  Man, I have had a couple of those root canals done and let me tell ya, they ain't no fun.

Got home and looked at the garage heater with the voltmeter.  Noted that there was no power to the igniter!  Go figure, it could not be anything simple.  Then I noticed that there was a plastic tube in there that had come off it's nipple (I was wondering how I would ever get to use that word here).  I stuck it back on and tried again.  Walla!  Light, fire, and heat!  Wow, that was pretty simple and did not cost anything.  There is a little diaphram on the other end of the tube and the nipple is on the exhaust fan.  It must have to detect vacum and close a circuit before it will allow anything else to happen.  I was releived when I found that it was so simple.

So, has anyone heard from that sky lighter guy?  We gonna play cards tonight or not?  I am ready, and secretly hoping that I do not get at Bobby's table.  Well I have to get back to the grindstone.  C U all later at the Lodge!  From LakeIwannabethere, take care and N Joy the Hunt././Jimbo

[McGurk]

Trip's back on, weather's looking up and the card table is a'callin'.  I'm not much of a gambler, due to the fact that I go to win.  It's only a gamble if you are unsure of the outcome, and I do know the outcome.  Besides, I guess there is a new gal walking around that is quite a looker.  Even the lady's are commenting on her looks.  I do want to see for myself, because a cat turd doesn't look so bad when it's sitting next to a cow pie, some horse apples, and some dog doo, if you get my drift.  It's all relative, my friends.  Now, if you could compare it to that cougar in a red sweater with them sexy black boots, that would get my attention.  Skinny knows the one: Candi, was it?  It may very well be that Mindy and Mandy have a little competion around here if the newcomer does too much strutting around town. Nytelyter better stay on his toes, if he knows what's good for him.  He had been making quite a few runs in to Root Beer Island from his shack, from the looks of the tracks.

That's one of the things I love about winter: tracking.  You can always get a bit of history just from walking around outside off the trail before the next snowfall or melt.  Assumptions can be made, and usually are, but the fun is trying to piece together what has happened since the last inch of snow has fallen.  3 or 4 deer had been through here, and then some coyote tracks in the same direction.  Squirrels running from tree to feeder, and back again.  Rabbits popping from bush to bush, and then doing a little sunning out in the open.  A fox had run directly to the sunning spot, and a chase ensued.  Mouse tracks, zigzagging here and there, digging a tunnel and disappearing for a couple feet, then back out.  It moves like that across the yard, and then the telltale soft parallel stripes in the snow.  Owl  No more mouse.  A couple of jumps, and then airborne once again.  An odd series of  long spread-out bird tracks, and then long sweeping marks in the snow: Pheasant.  Muskrat runs in the swamps, congregating crows by a trash can; it's not that too tough to get a picture of what happened, if you put your imagination into it. 

Kinda like here, with Bobby leading the way of late, and giving us tracks to follow so we can get an idea of what Lake IWannaBeThere is like.  He lays out a trail, feeding us info between the tracks, and letting us make the connections.  The rest of the crew help to fill in some of the gaps, but the best part is getting to try to link story to story.  I personally hope the book deal works out; not only for Bobby, but for all of us.

[Duckslayer]

Trip's back on, weather's looking up and the card table is a'callin'.  I'm not much of a gambler, due to the fact that I go to win.  It's only a gamble if you are unsure of the outcome, and I do know the outcome.

{thinking so self, Sure McGurk, sure }

[Tami]

As i sit at the bar, drinking a glass of hamms with two olives in it, the front door opens, thinking its others to find out about the game, i didn't look up till i hear the ahhs of a few men here at the lodge. I looked up to see Brandi Butt, one of the Butt sisters walk in. I had to do a double take on how she was dressed, people around here dont dress like that.. Tight red pants with a long fur coat and boots that went over her knee. You should have seen the men's eyes as she gracefully slipped her bottom on that bar stool, her coat slipping off her shoulders and falling around her. She could have pulled that low cut sweater up some geeze...
I drank my beer and i bundled myself up to tackle that trail can once and for all, i think we might need it with Brandi around..
Nodding as i walked by she blew me a kiss, a kiss i tell you.. geeze

[Bobby Bass]

 I go over to the calendar and circle the date. Been a long time since the Lodge had three women in it unescorted. Grabbing a clean bar apron I go over to take the young gals drink order, she is looking a little parched as we say in these parts...

[Bobby Bass]

HiYa from Lake Iwanttobethere. Since we have been here now for better then two weeks I thought it was time that we should share some more thoughts about the lake and the Lodge. First off, HiYa  is the official Lodge greeting.  An interesting word with a cloudy past. Here at Lake Iwanttobethere (in a county that can't be pronounced ) the word is used as a greeting between Lodge members and towns people. Visitors and tourists don't have a clue when we say it to them and there frowns quickly help us pick them out. For local people using the word HiYa gets them the town discount. At the Lodge the Hamms beer chaser is free when buying a shot of Turkey.  At the Masterbaiters Shop it gets ya a few extra shiners. At Ma and Pa's and extra slice of deli meat and at Amy's a 13th roll to your doz. We can't tell you all the benefits, you will have to just say HiYa and see what you get.

HiYa is used a lot on the water when yelling from boat to boat or shanty to shanty. All you need to do is yell HiYa and the fishermen's name if you remember it. If not, just saying HiYa is enough for them to know you are from here. Fishing information can then be exchange with real weights, numbers and location. HiYa also works at family gatherings, high school reunions and meeting old girlfriends on the streets. Just saying HiYa gets you past that awkward moment. HiYa between deer hunters gets you the same results and when out on the trails saying HiYa with other bird hunters saves time.  So if you see a fellow Lodge member on the street and you are not sure, Just say HiYa  From Lake Iwanttobethere. (877)

[nytelyter]

ok welll, you prolly guess by nopw that we will play on saturdays at 12:30. sorry i had a guest arrive at the fishhouse tuesday eve and welll lets just say i had enough supplies there, that there was no need to leave, heheheh.  sounds like maybe even three tables. oh and yeah. like i believe that bobby aint never played holdem. that would be like saying that the sun never rises. ok heres the skinny. when you get all signed up you will buy your two drink chips for ten dollars and will be given a stack of poker chips that equal a thousand. blinds will start low and will raise every half hour. hope to see you all there. will be a funn time. as poker director i wil not be allowed to play and will deal the final table of 8. but i will be able to play in a side game after the tourney for those interested. ... paul

[Tami]

HiYa....As i walk out of the lodge, shaking my head to what i just saw, i shrug it off and head for the trail tree with the cam in it.. As i stand there, now taller then before from the pile of snow under it, i look around to see if theres anything thats visible that might give me a clue why its not working. A few dead branches here and there not nothing really in the way of the lens.. No squirrel today, thats odd, i always hear a squirrel when i come close, i thought maybe the old branches that were here last time was its nest..

Well i see nothing, so i climb up the tree, making it about half way before my feet slip and down into the pile of snow, and into it was the word, i sunk down towards the bottom, that i almost had to dig my way out just like a Avalanche victim.. So i tried it again after a few choice words and a dusting off, and this time i make it up as i hurried up to the branch, picking up the cam and looking at it, i slid off my glove, i slid my finger over the surface.. nothing, nothing was there. I disconnected the wires and placed the cam in my cargo pocket and back down the tree i went.. I looked around then hurried back to Burtha's shoppe.

 Once inside i was showing the others the cam and pointing out that there was nothing on the cam lens .. Tess who was already in curlers said it might be pith from that old pine tree.. maybe i thought..But wouldn't we see that?

I asked if anyone told anyboby about the cam, Burtha said Barney .. not the dog.. knew about it.. I nodded and no one else said anything. Why would they, they are checking up on their husbands, so i don't think they would tell..

I saw Barney.. not the dog... the other day i think, sneaking out back of the lodge, carrying in wooden boxes will with some sort of bottles, i could hear them rattle as he ran from woods to the back of the lodge.. I wonder whats he doing back there, maybe i should go and check this out... Well later i need to warm up more and get this cam cleaned up..

I walk back to where we wash the girls hair, and i begin to clean the cam lens, then i noticed something was coming off, a sliver color flaking... as i dried it with a towel. I rubbed harder and then yelled " i found it" the others..

I ran back into the front of the shop and showed them what i found, someone put something silver on the lens, that only means one thing, they know its there.. Time for a new strategy...

All of us ladies gathered around.. just as the Butt sisters and Flo entered and what to know what was going on, so we told them the story and they agreed, they are in on this mission of ours too..

Stay tuned for more upcoming news from Lake Iwanttobethere
from me to you. Put a smile on your face. Don't eat yellow snow. And don't stick your tongue to anything metal outside.

[McGurk]

2 grumpy old men are sitting at the bar amongst the rest at the lodge. In walks Brandi. John says to Max: "Careful, the devil wears red..."

Watch it, Skinny...

[Duckslayer]

HiYa and  hunter.  Good to have ya in the neighborhood!  I am kind of a jack of all trades and master of none so if ya need any help I can prolly swing a hand or a hammer for ya now an again.  Again, welcome to the lake.  Take care and N Joy the Hunt././Jimbo

[Bobby Bass]

HiYa, Say Hunter thanks for the nickle tip, I'll add it to the daughters college fund. And as far as you walking out and not paying. Next time look down. Barney, the dog was watching you the entire time. From the Lodge at Lake Iwantobethere..