New Fish Pop Quiz

[Grute Man]

I thought that fish was gonna start singin that old country song "Hello, wall.  I didn't see you standin thar."  Who sang that?  Box Car Williie?    :ROTFLMAO:

OK.  Nice joke.  Next one please.   

[Lee Borgersen]

I'm all Pop Quized out for a while, but here's a fish tail for ya.
 New Pop Quiz question soon.

One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful beach, with his fishing pole propped up in the sand and his solitary line cast out into the sparkling blue surf. He was enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun and the prospect of catching a fish.

About that time, a businessman came walking down the beach, trying to relieve some of the stress of his workday. He noticed the fisherman sitting on the beach and decided to find out why this fisherman was fishing instead of working harder to make a living for himself and his family.

"You aren't going to catch many fish that way," said the businessman to the fisherman, "you should be working rather than lying on the beach!"

The fisherman looked up at the businessman, smiled and replied, "And what will my reward be?"

"Well, you can get bigger nets and catch more fish!" was the businessman's answer.

"And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman, still smiling.

The businessman replied, "You will make money and you'll be able to buy a boat, which will then result in larger catches of fish!" "And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman again.

The businessman was beginning to get a little irritated with the fisherman's questions. "You can buy a bigger boat, and hire some people to work for you!" he said.

"And then what will my reward be?" repeated the fisherman.

The businessman was getting angry. "Don't you understand? You can build up a fleet of fishing boats, sail all over the world, and let all your employees catch fish for you!"

Once again the fisherman asked, "And then what will my reward be?"

The businessman was red with rage and shouted at the fisherman, "Don't you understand that you can become so rich that you will never have to work for your living again! You can spend all the rest of your days sitting on this beach, looking at the sunset. You won't have a care in the world!"

The fisherman, still smiling, looked up and said, "And what do you think I'm doing right now?"

[Realtree]

Great story...and very true.  ::

[guythathunts]

I like it.    :: 
~ Greg

[Lee Borgersen]

Have you ever left fish on a stringer to long or in a cooler over night PU. ::

Q. How do you stop a fish from smelling?

[Grute Man]

Talcalm powder under his fins?   ???

[WoodChuck]

 ???    ANSWER !! YES! rinse them off with cold water to remove the slime. after cleaning the fish put them into ice cold water to firm them up, and rinse them again with water . if they still have a fishy smell i add a tablespoon of vineager to the water to take it away .  same method works with fish that come from brackish back waters with a river water smell !
                                          woodchuck   ::

[Outdoors Junkie]

Thanks for the tip Woodchuck!

[Lee Borgersen]

Q. How do you stop a fish from smelling?

Some interesting concepts here, but not the right answers yet.

Talcum powder :ROTFLMAO:

WoodChuck............Way to serious, but interisting.

[rchaze60]

fish dont smell for they have no nostrils

[Lee Borgersen]

SMELL

As well as hearing your lure, fish can smell it from a distance. Fish have a very sensitive sense of smell. How sensitive? They can detect concentrations of chemicals as low as one part per trillion. That's the equivalent of one ounce of chocolate syrup in a million railroad cars full of milk. Salmon can detect smells from the waters where they were born from hundreds of miles away. Stands to reason then that a trout can smell a tasty nightcrawler from a few yards. Conversely, the same thing goes for the smell of bug spray from your hands on fishing line you have touched.

The sense of smell, or olfactory sense, is located in a fish's nostrils, which are actually called nares. There are two pairs of nares on both sides of the snout. For humans, smells are detected by sensing chemicals dissolved in air. Fish detect these chemicals in water. As water flows through the nares, the dissolved materials trigger the olfactory organ which in turn transmit signals to the brain.

[Lee Borgersen]

Still looking for the correct answer. The winner will be offered any four items of their choice out of my recycle bin in the back yard. ::

[Realtree]

Give him a full frontal Labotomy so his olfactory organ has nothing to transmit to!

[guythathunts]

Cut it's nose off!!!  ::  :death2:
~ Greg

[Lee Borgersen]

Q. How do you stop a fish from smelling?
A.  Cut it's nose off

After conferring with the panel of our judges we have arrived at the following decision.

We actually have 2 winners on this one.

Outdoors_Realtree... with a rather gruesome but anatomically correct answer. >:D
Guythathunts......... with the politically correct answer :detective:

[Lee Borgersen]

Q...I've caught a bunch of walleye this year with unsightly growths or tumors on them. What causes these growths? Are the fish safe to eat? How should I prepare my catch?
  
A...Walleye are commonly affected by two skin conditions that may occur separately or in combination. Differentiation of the two infections may be somewhat difficult for the untrained eye. Both of these conditions are considered to be caused by fish viruses.


 These viral skin infections are not associated with walleye mortality, and they are harmless to humans. Infected walleye should be processed for consumption in the normal manner. On the rare occasion when a skin lesion penetrates into the musculature, that portion of the fish tissue can be removed and discarded to improve its appearance.

[rchaze60]

i dont know about eating a fish with those on them....... just something about eating a fish with sores and tumors on em that gives me that ill feeling  :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO:

[Lee Borgersen]

I usually just eat the sores and tumors and throw the rest out. I figure it will help to build up your resistance to such things. Oops my bandage just fell off from all the oozing ::whyclick::

[holdemtwice]

 LMAO  WAY TOO FUNNY  SMALLMOUTH  DO YOU NEED A BANDAGE ??  I EAT AND EAT AND EAT  FISH.  LOVE EM !!

[Realtree]

 ::whyclick:: ::dito ::hittingself::

[holdemtwice]

SAME REASON WHY I CLICKED IT  REALTREE    ::hittingself:: ::hittingself:: ::hittingself:: ::hittingself:: ::hittingself::

[Grute Man]

Good thing this isn't in the BBQ forum.  It would ruin the hole ambiance.   ::hittingself::

OK here's another fish riddle.  What happens when you throw a GREEN rock in the RED sea?    ???   ???

[Lee Borgersen]

You get Kryptonite?

[Realtree]

You get Bluegills

[Grute Man]

Nice trys but you can't "make" kryptonite, you have to go get it.  And red + green does not make blue.  Any other ideas out yonder?  ???

[Realtree]

If you throw a Green rock into the Red Sea I think it would sink to the bottom... ::hittingself::

[Lee Borgersen]

It gets wet?

[Grute Man]

TAAA DAAAAAAAA!!  Two right answers.  It will sink and get wet.  I wont deny either of you the grand prize of mowing my lawn.  PM me and we'll set up a time for you to reap your rewards.

Here's another:Why did the whale cross the road?

[guythathunts]

Because it was stapled to the chicken!

[Grute Man]

No but I like the way you think.  I think.   ::hittingself::