Bobby Bass, Random Thoughts

[Pegg]

Why does a store that is open 24 hours a day 7 days a week and open 365 days a year have locks on the doors?

[Bobby Bass]

How come in order to turn your computer off you have to click on start?

[Bobby Bass]

So tell me how running in -10 weather with your snot froze to your face is good for ya?

[HD]

How come you can never find a nail when you need one, but your tire aways seems to find one when you don't?

[kingfisher1]

why is it that when you don't need the police, they're everywhere, but when you need them, they're no where to be found?

[Lee Borgersen]

  Business conventions are important because they demonstrate
how many people
a company can operate without.

[Lee Borgersen]

 Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than
everyone else
looks?

[Ryan]

  Business conventions are important because they demonstrate
how many people
a company can operate without.

This is very true.  I also would not be suprised if they come up with a college degree for a meeting attender.  You just have to learn how to carry a notebook and pen then pretend you are paying attention.  I think a lot of people already are making a career of it.

[Lee Borgersen]

'You  know that your landing gear is up and locked when it  takes full power to taxi to the  terminal.'
 

[Bobby Bass]

How do dogs hear the sound of a milkbone box being opened when they are upstairs and rooms away? 

[thunderpout]

That and when ya put three milkbones in your pocket, then give em two of em, they know ya have one more..... dogs know how to count....

[Bobby Bass]

Why do big fish always splash on the surface where you just came from? 

[Big Slick]

Is there really a dark side of the moon?

[Bobby Bass]

So someone tell me how it is healthy to be running at high noon in 90 degree weather wearing a black running outfit... 

[Fishabass]

At what point seperates "a deer in the headlights look" change to a deer on the hood?

[shunt8]

Do fish think like we do when we set the hook - hey, this feels like a good one - only to be disappointed when they see us too? :fishing2:

[Fishabass]

I know that corn oil comes from corn....
cannola oil comes from cannola beans....
peanut oil comes from peanuts......

where does baby oil come from?

[Bobby Bass]

How far do you need to travel from home before you become a tourist?

[Bobby Bass]

Today I put on my winter jacket and found money in the pocket, do I

A) Wonder if the wife is hiding money in my pocket?
B) Wonder if I am hiding money in my pocket and forgot?
C) Treat the money as income and report it to the wife?

Or

D) Treat it as found money and spend it on fishing tackle..

[Lee Borgersen]

Well, if that happened to me I would choose "B" and proceed to place it in my wallet before I forgot where It was again.

[Randy Kaar]

I would choose D...  spend it on beer and snacks for the football game or deer camp.

randy

[HD]

I was wondering where that 20 went................ 

[Bobby Bass]

Here is a mess of them...

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

There is great need for a sarcasm font.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?   

Was learning cursive really necessary?

Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5.  Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired. 

Bad decisions make good stories .   

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just arent going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray?   I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page story that I swear I did not make any changes to.

"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this --  ever.

I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

My 4-year old grandson asked me in the car the other day "Papa what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

I think the freezer deserves a light as well .

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay .

Life is short...... eat dessert first.

[thunderpout]

Does "knocking on wood" work when there isnt any wood around to knock on?

[MNBucKKiller]

Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I’m from, this shouldn’t be a problem….

[thunderpout]

yeah.... and its not like anyone will question you or dought what you say... theyve just met you....

[Bobby Bass]

A sign of retirement is now you have time to drip dry in the shower!